Happy Indonesia Mother's Day (December 22nd)

A mother's love determines how
We love ourselves and others.
There is no sky we'll ever see
Not lit by that first love.

Stripped of love, the universe
Would drive us mad with pain;
But we are born into a world
That greets our cries with joy.

How much I owe you for the kiss
That told me who I was!
The greatest gift--a love of life--
Lay laughing in your eyes.

Because of you my world still has
The soft grace of your smile;
And every wind of fortune bears
The scent of your caress.

(Turlough O'Carolan)


For all that you have given me,
I can return but love. For you
Bound up the wounds I did not see
And gave me hopes and passions new.

I can return but love for you,
Whose unmoved faith my heart did move,
And gave me hopes and passions new,
And loved me till I turned to love.

Whose unmoved faith did my heart move?
The mother of my heart, not blood,
Who loved me till I turned to love.
And I became the soul I would.

The mother of my heart, not blood,
Bound up the wounds I did not see.
And I became the soul I would
For all that you have given me.

(Dimitri Shostakovich)

Happy Mother's Day to my dear Mum,
Author of my personality:
Pleased, I hope, with what you read in me;
Pleased, I hope, with episodes to come.
Yet now I, too, would get some pleasure from
Making you the book in which I see,
Of all the players in my family,
The central character, whom I would plumb.
How beautiful to move in that direction!
Each to each a separate source of pleasure,
Reading in the other's happiness,
in much description, underlying love.
So would we deepen the connection,
Discovering new passages to treasure
As we follow time towards tenderness,
Yearning for what years unread will prove.

(J. S. Bach)

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Two moons in an hour

Two moons in an hour
like reflecting to each other
is there a mirror between?
or my head is getting dizzy?

Two moons with lazy rays
though no clouds in front of them
kind of reflections I've never found
they get me dizzy or I'm getting myself so

The importance and only thing
the only thing that I can think
it's two moons in their real shapes

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Journey to the Mountains

Five great stones splitted a lone river. Right in the middle lied the biggest, yet the generous one. As I had walked for nine-hundreds steps under the knee-height water surface, I became slower than a band of snails. There, on the great stone I leaned. With all hopeless staring at high, high skyscrapers. My sweats ran dry like flood in rainy season, my throat was left nothing but the drought. Yet, the steps would have been twenty-fold of I had crawled from the river bank. To wipe the wet forehead, to scrap the dirts on shoulders unifying with the temper of my nerves. As water splash kept breaking the stone, it could had had been hotter than that afternoon’s sun.

The blue sky turned to gray a while, then completely dark since I had not afforded to count my own fingers. There was a black out over the generous stone. Completely blacked out I was under the sky for a moment or two.

Then came across the all-white shadows on an alien prairie. No houses even huts ahead every direction. No hands but the sound of a flying crow like a rolling thunder. And suddenly … furry, black crow truly smashed my back into deadly pains. That was a big, big crow I had ever seen the whole life. It was nothing I could guess whether he or she. The eyes were as black as the furs, and the tallons, and even the tongue…yes I saw the tongue. I was scared in deep hopelessness.

“What are you doing on my back? Hitting me from behind, hhuhh?” Annoyed by the crow’s disguising visit I shouted like a mad one. “Hitting me from behind? Stabbing when I’m blinded?” And whatsoever mocking and cynicism like I had used to see on my daily days.

As the crow was no more than having no answer machine but koaa…koaa..koaa…words I did not understand at all. “Killing me like a cowards, hhhuhh?” My voice even was louder than ever.

“Koaa…koaa…koaa…” The crow said nothing more than “koaa…koaa..koaa…” Then after three times of turning back it flied over my head and went the distance. My back pain got lighter, I got better than minutes ago when the black, giant tallons seemed to bruise my very skins to bones.

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Power - less

Empty road into the wood

Stony walks nearby the banks

Crossing all bushes when sun so young

At the gravel after the rain

Footsteps were hard to find the shelter

Closer about to water stream

This slippery soils prevented the stand

Verify too harsh, verily hard

When light was blocked to blackened eye

It was long way to go through it

It was very wild and mean

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Nothing more

When leaves start falling
there's nothing to do but to hope
that they fertilize your soils
one day

On which crops be alive
for your future needs

Days come and go and
you're a cameo of universe blockbusters
you're nothing more

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A World (Vladislav Katzarski)

Wind
silence
and sand.
No strength even to die.
Waiting
hoping
in vain.
And a candle you light for yourself thereby.
Enough
the ivory tower
all ablaze,
Good for nothing, you see!
Holes
molehills
and stones,
Good though, we call it world.

Author: Vladislav Katzarski

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Ketika Saya Bertanya

Sampai kapankah saudara berlari mengejar setoran sambil berkamuflase "Tuhan, berikanlah kemudahan", sementara lidah saudara siap-siap menjilat pantat bau busuk pimpinan saudara?
Sampai kapan saudara berkhayal meniduri seorang cantik laksana bidadari sembari berdalih "aku mencintaimu", sementara saudara acuh terhadap cinta sejati seorang perempuan dekil?

Sampai kapan saudara terus teriak, "aku cinta negeriku" sambil menenteng tas ransel bersulam materialisme, berisikan pernik-pernik bernuansa seberang entah-berantah?

Sampai kapan saudara berpuisi, "lihat mereka berjuang demi sesuap nasi" sambil mengunyah makanan cepat saji pembangun kanker?

Sampai kapan saudara meracau "kita harus bangkit bersama" sambil mendengus mengendap di kegelapan demi mencuri langkah?

Sampai kapan saudara berdakwah penuh hiasan ayat suci sambil berprasangka bahwa mereka yang buta akan itu adalah bukan manusia mulia?

Sampai kapan saudara bernyanyi merdu "aku orang Indonesia" sambil ketakutan oleh sengatan matahari pada kulit saudara?

Sampai kapan saudara berdendang tentang kebanggaan nenek moyang, kekayaan alam, sambil terbata-bata menyimak bahasa yang layaknya saudara pahami dalam satu letupan ide?
Sampai kapan saudara berkumandang, "anda sangat mengerti" sedangkan saudara tak pernah mengerti?

Sampai kapan saya bertanya? Sampai nanti...

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O-zone ku menganga

Dengarkan ia merintih
dengarkan ia menangis
asa yang terluka oleh
gejolak insan semesta

Camkan ia berkisah
selamilah dalam pintanya
retak tempatku berpijak
tertusuk panas sembilu

Terkuras habis keringat negeri
oleh panas suasana
tatkala langit kan binasa
karena tiada atap menghalang

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Identity Crisis (E. D. Reeve)

Guest poem by F. D. Reeve

He was urged to prepare for success: "You never can tell,
he was told over and over; "others have made it;
one dare not presume to predict. You never can tell.

Who’s Who in America lists the order of cats
in hunting, fishing, bird-watching, farming,
domestic service--the dictionary order of cats

who have made it. Those not in the book are beyond the pale.
Not to succeed in you chosen profession is unthinkable.
Either you make it or--you’re beyond the pale.

Do you understand?"
"No," he shakes his head.
"Are you ready to forage for freedom?"
"No," he adds,
"I mean, why is a cat always shaking his head?

Because he’s thinking: who am I? I am not
only one-ninth of myself. I always am
all of the selves I have been and will be but am not."

"The normal cat," I tell him, "soon adjusts
to others and to changing circumstances;
he makes his way the way he soon adjusts."

"I can’t," he says, "perhaps because I’m blue,
big-footed, lop-eared, socially awkward, impotent,
and I drink too much, whether because I’m blue

or because I like it, who knows. I want to escape
at five o’clock into an untouchable world
where the top is the bottom and everyone wants to escape

from the middle, everyone, every day. I mean,
I have visions of two green eyes rising
out of the ocean, blinking, knowing what I mean."

"Never mind the picture, repeat after me
the self’s creed. What he tells you you
tells me and I repeats. Now, after me:

I love myself, I wish I would live well.
Your gift of love breaks through my self-defeat.
All prizes are blue. No cat admits defeat.
The next time that he lives he will live well."

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Lagu Rindu

Pada tetes embun selaksa kali menggores batu,
Pada air mata yang silih berganti bersihkan kabur,
Pada malam sejuta bintang tanpa sulam cahaya bertirai fana,
Pada liukan jalan berjenjang tatkala hijau meraba,
Pada gersang ketika ingin dahaga membelai rasa,
Pada kelam yang punahkan kesangsian di jiwa,
Pada marah dan siksa yang berujung cambuk pendobrak sukma,
Pada hampa swara swasana sisihkan gurauan lantang menggoda,
Pada dera mencerai menerpa bisikkan sutra terhunus duri petaka,
Pada badai, petir, ombak menyambar menguji bahtera,
Pada cacian hina durjana berhias tiara berbias takhta...

Setiyo W. Widodo, 16/5/2009., untuk orang-orang terkasih.

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Flattering

When I go down you catch me in
When I'm away you send a prayer
When I get lost you trace me back
When I'm asleep your angel guards
When I'm awake you never leave

It's when only hope can fill the room

SWW, April 15, 2009

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It is never too late till it is late

When the Three Musketeers spell "all for one, one for all", no bullets or swords will hurt. Though aging times shadows, though exhausts bruise their fleshes and bones.
Fighting for the honor in agony, easing the paralysed hope of their fellows. They stand on pain, the stand on wound.
One for all the messages, which say "never give up!". All for one hope, "nothing's impossible".
The kit they wear is the kit of million tears and joys. The kit they wear is one that denies impossibilities.
When the Three Musketeers step up to the battlefield, their hearts are greater than their fellows' dreams. Their blood runs faster than our nervous skins.
If they should die, I want them to die with honor badge around their shoulders. As what they've done so far has been great.
Tribute to the Three Musketeers of Rossoneri: Paolo Maldini, Massimo Ambrosini, and Filippo Inzaghi.
FORZA MILAN !

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A Night Beyond the Horizon

By the sky I raise my sights
By the moon I stare insights
By the grass I lay my delights
By the hills I see the lights

The moon as I see through glancing
Line of hopes continue growing
As I crawl the mountains with pain in rain
Feel the beginning a chant of gain

Steps are millions toward the shore
Leaving the home for the longed for
Though nights deny long time before
A simple mind I can ignore

Shadows come as star falling
The eastern sky the night's belonging
Through evening star flies my calling
West horizon star be landing

Setiyo W. Widodo, Semarang, Indonesia, April 8th, 2009.

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I do

I do believe in...

rain to shower the desert
snow hanging the tropical rim
sixty-first second of a minute
the eigth day of just a week
the thirteen month of just one year

I do comply with...

signs I dreamt last night
stitch I mend my clothes
string that splits my neck
nails that bruise my leg

I do...

I care what brought me down
I care what turned me on
I care what lifted me high
I care what blacked me out

I do...

commit to what you need
admit the things you bring
permit how treat you be
profit you start calling

I do...

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Purple Heart

Kan mentari undurkan diri
masih kusisa senyum di hati
kan pelangi henti lingkari
bidadari tetap bernyanyi

Dewi malam tak kunjung salam
di ujung pantai tak kilau tiram
hembus bayu dalam temaram
tajam menusuk keras menghunjam

Satu warna beribu makna
enyah duka tengah melanda
kelebat sutra ungu merona
kibaskan lara sang semenjana

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